Saturday, 13 October 2012

Leopard print loathing

Today was a day well spent.
Me and Holly travelled to our local town in search of the perfect Scary Spice costume, resulting in a lot of leopard print and little happiness.

First stop was the shop that doesn't know it's fancy dress - Primark.
Don't get me wrong, they have some really lovely clothes, most of my wardrobe consists of them, but when it's bad, it's really bad.
After searching through the extensive 'horrible animal print section', as it is now named, we found some leopard trousers (yes trousers) and a black sequinned bandeau. Very scary.
At the changing rooms mild embarrassment struck when the girl doing her shift there was in fact from our very own school, our very own year and our very own classes. We ensured her that these were for Halloween purposes, but she still looked partially horrified.

In the changing rooms, I hung up the ghastly garments and with a deep sigh, put them on.
They were horrific.
The bandeau looked like something out of a tribute act - but not for the Spice Girls - and the trousers were just, well, they were leopard print trousers weren't they.

After Primark, naturally the next point of call is the charity shops. We are blessed with around ten of these treasures, and they did not let us down today, with an array of disgusting leopard prints, we were overjoyed.
Unfortunately (and worryingly), the sizes were around 14 and above, except for one little gem. A top/skirt/hankerchief in the most god awful print you will ever see or hear about.

On our way down towards H&M (the second cheapest high street store in town) we witnessed a very peculiar sight. Stood outside H&M was a roughly nine-year-old boy eating a sandwich. He was not an extraordinary boy in any way, but what caught our eye was the quite frankly massive marrow that was so naturally slung over his shoulder. I can only assume that it was a regular occurrence for him, as he did not look at all self-conscious as he stood on the highstreet on a Saturday afternoon, monching on his sandwich and holding his marrow.

Inside H&M itself we were once again on a mission for a disgusting leopard print, and we were not let down. There was a wide range of leopard print bottoms for us to choose from, however some of them were in legging form and if you're wearing a grotty print you can't also wear leggings as trousers can you? There can only be so many broken fashion rules in one outfit, even at Halloween.

"It looks the most like it could be an outfit, rather than something from a dressing up box"

"I look like I should be in a nativity"

Just incase you couldn't already tell, we aren't really sold on it.

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